The 1000 Days Guide to knowing when it’s time to break up with that dude.
1. You fantasies about them having an affair.
2. You seriously prefer extracting in-grown hairs from your legs to their company.
3. Their extraneous use of the words ‘gluten-free’ cause you annoyance even when you are not physically in the same room as them.
4. Their attempts at romantic sweet nothings make you bark with laughter.
5. You feel sorry for them.
6. They prefer extracting hair from their chin with tweezers to kissing you.
7. Any amount of the dinner you cooked them lands on your hair or face in protest at what you have made.
8. They accuse you of trying to kill them by serving over ripe avocado.
9. You can feel the hair on your arms rise in your defense when they start getting all romantic and sexy with you.
10. He invites his ‘estranged’ wife to Christmas lunch instead of you.
11. He tells you he’s had ‘fantasies’ about you and a woman he works with.
12. He congratulates you on being smart – maybe even smarter than him!
13. You’ve heard that story before and saying so doesn’t stop him.
1000 days 