I was just listening to a podcast about body language. It was a joke/satire where an expert and a schlepper have their opinions about couples gathered in a park. The expert reads all body language as The End of the relationship. The schlepper reads it all as ‘sweet’ or ‘new’.
Now they were trying to reveal a truth about ‘experts’ but what I got out of it was this:
Perhaps every relationship is simultaneously at the point of being good and bad at the same time.
Perhaps Each and every moment has both meanings in it and the truth of each moment is determined only by the next moment, the truth of which is then determined by the next moment.
Hardly a new idea, I suppose, but interesting to think you have a choice at every point.
Where I have always felt like my future had been determined by the amount of shared history and the heaviness of that history kept any escape hatch or surprise wonderfulness in its pre -determined place, perhaps each and every moment presents both those things? And what came before doesn’t tie you to anything more?
In other words, perhaps when a relationship is good, it is good. And when it is bad, it is bad. And there is no need to flog oneself to change it, only to decide if one wants to continue with it into the future?
1000 days 